Clitoral Stimulation 101

Your Crash Course in Clitoral Pleasure

, with the clitoris being described as a hard-to-find knub. However, this is far from the truth.

As the sexual organ that's analogous to the penis, the clitoris is the locus of sexual pleasure for just about anyone with a vulva. If that's you, keep clitorial pleasure where it belongs— front and center — by prioritizing it while having sex! These are all the clitoral anatomy basics you and/or your partner will ever need to be more impressive in bed. 

1. The (internal) clitoris as big as the penis.

 in size – proportionally, as big as the penis.

If you’re scratching your head right now, it’s because the visible outside part of it makes for only ¼ of its body. The rest is located inside. The clit can even become erect: it contains two internal bulbs made out of spongy tissue – like the one in the penis shaft – which swells with blood once stimulated. This process is called a 

 of those with vulvas need their clits touched to orgasm.

 of the clitoris, or the external part, which is analogous to the head of a penis. While orgasms 

 possible without engaging the clit, more often than not, the clit is key. Think of it this way— pleasuring a vulva without touching the clit is like pleasuring a penis without touching that super-sensitive head!

In fact, you can employ similar techniques for oral sex on both body types. For example, gently sucking on the glans or head is a great way to score gold. If you need a visual guide of how this works in real life, check out 

 by Lustery couple Mike and Candy! Mike gives a valuable lesson on how to use your tongue wisely for maximum clitoral pleasure.

3. Clitorial pleasure can support reproduction. 

? When the clitoris is stimulated, the cervix shifts position, and the vaginal canal becomes elongated and lubricated. It's not just about preparing for a penis: These changes also facilitate fecundation, all of them catalyzed first and foremost by the clitoris. 

"It turns out, "vaginal" orgasms are actually just clitoral orgasms in disguise."

Ever heard that there are “vaginal orgasms” that happen through penetration, and “clitoral orgasms”? It turns out, "vaginal" orgasms are actually just clitoral orgasms in disguise. 

Even during penetration, the organ responsible for pleasure and orgasms is in fact the clitoris. Not the glans,  that you see, but the internal parts – the bulbs. These sensitive little bands can be stimulated when touching the walls of the vaginal canal right at the entrance. Experiment scissoring your fingers or moving them up and down against the walls.

The bulbs also wrap around the G-spot, another 

 commonly believed to be the source of "vaginal" orgasms. A small and ridgy erogenous zone that's analogous to the prostate, the G-spot is a key component of vaginal ejaculation. You can find it by inserting your fingers, and curving them upward in a “c’mon” fashion. Nonetheless, such orgasms still involve the clitoris, whether the glans gets direct attention or not.  

5. The more turned on they are, the tighter they'll feel.

Vaginal "tightness" is also kind of a myth. How tight someone feels has nothing to do with the number of sexual partners they've had— it's influenced by a variety of factors, including degree of arousal. That's where the clit comes in.

When the clit gets erect, the bulbs engorge around the vaginal canal, adding pressure and, of course, making things "tighter." So that’s the secret – you don’t need to find someone inexperienced, you just have to commit to getting them really turned on.

"...Most of us get the message, implicitly or explicitly, that the most important part of "sex" is penetration."

6. Clitoral pleasure is a major factor in the orgasm gap.

Did you know 86 percent of lesbians report 

, compared to merely 65 percent of straight women?

Clitoral pleasure has a lot to do with that.

The issue is the majority of vulva-owners need direct stimulation to the glans of the clitoris for an orgasm. But most of us get the message, implicitly or explicitly, that the most important part of "sex" is penetration. Queer women challenge this phallocentric viewpoint, and experience more pleasure as a result. 

However, queerness is not a prerequisite here— straight folks can also enjoy more mutually pleasurable exchanges (straight guys also have an 

 that's about twenty percentage points higher) by considering penetrative sex as just one of many options on the menu. It's a great part of sex, but certainly not all there is to it. 