Lustery couple Moxy & Verve met via dating app as undergrad art students. After falling in love and becoming “artistic companions,” shooting porn together seemed like a natural next step. Collaborating has only helped them grow as a couple.
Aria Vega [00:00:00] This podcast contains explicit content. Listener's discretion is advised. POV by Lustery explores culture, politics and creativity in the sex industry, one point of view at a time. I'm your host, Aria Vega.
Aria Vega [00:00:17] Lustery couple Moxy and Verve first met in January 2020 on the dating app, Taimi, which is one of the largest dating apps geared toward queer users. They were each living on the same college campus when Verve stumbled upon Moxy's profile. Verve's opening line was pretty direct.
Verve [00:00:35] My first message to you was, "I know people you know," so...
Moxy [00:00:41] Qhich was a little bit intimidating, but it definitely piqued my curiosity! Given my slightly messy history, that was either a really good thing or a not so great thing. But I figured if you were messaging me, it probably wasn't the latter.
Verve [00:00:56] Yeah. Yeah, that's true. But it ended up being a situation of, we had both dated and slept with two of the same people who had also hooked up previously with each other. It's like, there's only one degree of separation between like any trans person on a college campus, everyone has had sex.
Moxy [00:01:20] Yeah, so you realized that and then you ask me to come hang out and have pizza. So after class, I headed over to your place and you brought me food, which is always a direct way to my heart. Yeah, that was a good time. Then we had really, really great sex, and then I never left you alone after that.
Verve [00:01:40] Yeah,that's how that went. And then we fell in love!
Moxy [00:01:45] Yeah, you fed me and you fucked me good, and that's that's about all I need.
Aria Vega [00:01:50] That was that! I was going to ask if that mutual connection ended up playing matchmaker, but it sounds like that wasn't really necessary.
Verve [00:01:59] Yeah, we just ended up having so much in common. We have a really unique experience in art. We both have very unique artistic training from school that not a lot of people relate to, so it was really nice to be able to talk shop.
Aria Vega [00:02:14] Oh, tell me about that!
Verve [00:02:15] We're both multi-media artists with different interests, but there's so much overlap because we love sculpture especially, yeah.
Moxy [00:02:24] Yeah, we totally connected because we both love three-dimensional art, and we hadn't really talked to anyone else who was that into it, or who we could get into the logistics of it. I can mention my artistic passion to other people ad they're like, "That's cool, you make art." Whereas like with you I can be like, "Wow, so I used this technical thing to achieve X, Y or Z," and you'll know exactly what I'm talking about.
Verve [00:02:51] Yeah, it's easy to talk to you.
Aria Vega [00:02:54] They can speak the language.
Verve [00:02:55] Yeah, it's like we can speak the same artistic language. And I think that that's been one of the reasons why we got so close, so quick, and have stayed so close.
Moxy [00:03:03] Yeah, I definitely consider us like artistic companions as well as partners.
Verve [00:03:09] Yeah, same.
Aria Vega [00:03:10] How often do the two of you find yourselves collaborating on a visual art project? Is that a part of your relationship pretty regularly?
Moxy [00:03:18] Yeah, we have a lot of friends who are in creative arts or do other creative projects who maybe want a piece of artwork done. And we're always the people to turn to and be like, Yeah,we'll make a poster for you. We'll paint or customize the back of your truck to look like a big snake for your whatever party. So that's definitely something...
Verve [00:03:43] And we collaborate on making porn also, a lot, which is great. I'm so glad to have you in that as well. You're basically why I started to get into camming and making porn, so I'm thankful for that and being creative in that way. I think it's really fun.
Aria Vega [00:04:01] Verve, you said Moxy was the one who sort of brought you into that world. Had you ever been curious about it before, or was that a completely new endeavor for you?
Verve [00:04:11] I have always been curious about doing sex work and making porn. I had already been like shooting little clips on my own, and stuff like that. I was kind of just looking for an opportunity tomove into that. But also I was really nervous when I started. I am the kind of person, I cannot stand up in front of a room of people, but for some reason I can show over a thousand random people on the internet my butthole. Don't ask me why!
Moxy [00:04:38] Mhm.
Verve [00:04:39] Yeah, but it was amazing. It was so great to have you guide me on that. You had already been camming for, I think a couple of years on your own.
Moxy [00:04:48] On and off, I had been dabbling.
Verve [00:04:51] You said it was boring.
Moxy [00:04:53] Yeah, I was really bored all the time, I was just sitting there by myself.
Verve [00:04:56] I was like, "Oh, I'll join you!" And then I just never left.
Aria Vega [00:04:59] Moxy was also pretty new to partnered content when she first hooked up with Verve.
Moxy [00:05:04] I had posted some stuff online. I had done some streams by myself, but I hadn't ventured into doing anything with partners. But then when the pandemic hit, I picked up streaming again as a way to make a little bit of extra pocket money, just because there weren't a lot of a ton of options. But that was kind of boring, doing it on my own. So I told you about it, and griped to you about it long enough that...
Verve [00:05:28] And then I was like, "Oh, but it would be so much more fun if we did it together though!" Yeah, I remember when we first started camming, we had like— I always tell this story, we had this, you know, those depression lights that you get, that you put in your apartment. You had one of those, and we only had one plug in that bedroom, and it would go across the bed. So that was how we started camming. It looked okay on camera, like it looked totally fine, but we were always kicking it. And I just think about how....
Moxy [00:05:54] Every time we fucked too hard, you'd just see the light kind of wobbling in the background a little bit.
Verve [00:05:59] Yeah, so I'm glad that we've been reinvesting in our porn work.
Aria Vega [00:06:06] We've come a long way from those humble beginnings. When did you first notice that you were really starting to gain a following?
Moxy [00:06:13] I think it's probably when we hit 50K...
Verve [00:06:16] On Chaturbate.
Moxy [00:06:17] ...on Chaturbate, that it really sunk in that we were doing something that people wanted to pay attention to [which] was pretty interesting.
Verve [00:06:27] And also for me, when we started to work with Lustery, that was when I started to actually see myself making more porn, making porn that I want to make, and kind of branching into what I wanted to do. So I really appreciate that opportunity, and I feel like it's helped me grow, and it's been fun to have guidelines for the videos you make, and then take advantage of also the freedom. So it's been really great.
Aria Vega [00:06:50] And again, speaking of freedom, I know that in addition to your prerecorded content that you, like you said you use Chaturbate, you like the live streams. Do you have a preference for either type of content?
Moxy [00:07:02] I think they offer different things that are good. I love the attention of being online. There's that immediate feedback of doing something really hot and seeing everyone just be like, Wow, oh my goodness, I love this. That can be really exciting in and of itself, so I enjoy that part of livestreaming. But there's definitely some times... Sometimes if people want to see things, they might want to see the same thing a bunch of times in a row, and I might be getting tired, but I still want to put on a good show. Whereas when we're just recording for ourselves, I can sort of take my time and really plan out visually how to make something like the hottest it can possibly be.So I'm just putting on as good a live performance as I can, if that makes sense, I get a little bit more artistic liberty.
Verve [00:07:50] Yeah, you get to edit it and think it through a little bit more. Whereas I think that... Honestly, I feel like camming offers me a place to improv. I just get to know that I'm going to get on camera, and what happens happens. Whereas when we get to plan our porn, it's a very different experience. I also love making subscription programs and stuff like that, because I think that those are a really great way to just record videos and then put them there, and then people get to watch them if they want to. Then I get to have a catalog of all of them, and I'm a bit of a tech nerd, so I like to organize it all and make it curated. Over time it gets better and better, because I keep going back and spending hours and hours just fixing one page.
Moxy [00:08:34] You also love watching your own shit.
Aria Vega [00:08:36] I was just going to ask, do you like watching your own content, like for your own pleasure, or to help you get better at making it? What is your relationship like with with what you make?
Moxy [00:08:46] You know, sometimes when our streams are slow and we're struggling to find some motivation to stay sexy, we'll just kind of go through the old Rolodex of stuff that we've done before, and that can typically help turn them, help us stay jazzed and happy and excited to be there and stuff. So I like looking at it, we've had fun rewatching our porn as a way of getting excited for each other in our own sex life.
Verve [00:09:22] Something I also want to note is, I get insecure when I go through the videos for the first time, like, Oh, why did I do that? Oh, why did I do that? I get so like hurt. So I feel like it's just a little bit of a process of self-acceptance, because after a while I watch the videos, I'm like, Oh my God, that was so hot, I love that video. So I think it's important to like, recognize those things that do come up that you get to move on from and grow from. Yeah, I'm thankful for that.
Moxy [00:09:49] Yeah, it's tricky for me going back to watch old videos because I have some vocal dysphoria. I don't love hearing my own voice played back, but eventually I can sort of similarly get over it and enjoy what I'm watching.
Verve [00:10:05] Yeah, but that insecurity is real and I think it's important to recognize that is a part of porn as well, learning what you're comfortable with and also overcoming and becoming your best... the self you want to be, and your best self for you.
Aria Vega [00:10:20] Yeah, I really appreciate you naming that. Like you said earlier about feeling stage fright in certain circumstances, but not when you're in front of the camera, I think a lot of people probably think that anybody who performs in porn is like, the life of the party everywhere they go, and is this super confident all the time kind of person. And there's there's just as many types of porn performers as there are people.
Verve [00:10:46] Absolutely.Yes!
Aria Vega [00:10:49] Do you feel like you come up a lot against stereotypes about what you should be like in your regular life because of what you do for work?
Moxy [00:10:57] Definitely. I think a lot of people make assumptions about how we must live our lives and what we must get up to in our own time. And it's like we're kinky and we have fun and we definitely have like pretty high sex drives, but I think people assume that we're just like fucking 24/7 and somehow can sustain the rest of our lives doing that.
Verve [00:11:23] Yeah, we're whole people with plenty of different interests and things. And I love getting to know sex workers and hearing about their personalities and stuff because just like you said, there are just as many sex workers of different varieties as there are anyone else. So that's great.
Aria Vega [00:11:43] That being said, though, do you ever find that that your content creation has any influence or impact on the sex that you have off camera?
Verve [00:11:51] I would say, yes, I know that I have discovered like a lot of kinks that I would have not explored if not for porn and for cam and making custom videos and stuff. There have been a lot of things I've discovered.
Aria Vega [00:12:07] Oh cool, like what?
Verve [00:12:07] I fucked a banana recently, that was pretty fun.
Aria Vega [00:12:09] Awesome!
Verve [00:12:10] It was great! I liked that more than I thought I would. Just like, new kink unlocked. We did that, I don't even know what it was about it, it was just really silly and fun, and I like to not take myself too seriously. But yeah, there's that.
Aria Vega [00:12:23] There's a clip that you have where you have a hammer dildo that looks really fucking cool. And when you mention the banana, it makes me wonder, is it something about it being a real object or having regular utility?
Verve [00:12:38] I almost wonder if it's something that's in everyone's homes, so it's almost something everyone can relate to.
Aria Vega [00:12:44] Yeah.
Verve [00:12:44] I've also personally been very drawn to feet. At first I was like, No, like feet are fine, I'm fine doing foot content, but I don't love it. And now I'm like, Oh no, I love it though. Now I love it.
Aria Vega [00:12:54] What about you, Moxy? Has making porn unlocked— has it awoken anything in you?
Moxy [00:13:00] I don't know. I don't think anything in specific, but I think it has let me have room to explore our communication dynamic, which I think has been really great. I think we've gotten really good at non-verbal communication, which has led to our sex life getting really, really great, I think because we can just jump into a scene that we want to do for fun without having to go over to too much, because we've already done a lot of this pre-talking about what we're comfortable with, like what's yes, what's no, how do we communicate that with subtleties, so that way we don't have to spill our whole guts out tothe internet when we maybe want something to start or end on-stream.
Verve [00:13:48] We also have had to put a lot of practice into that, though. That's taken a lot of work for us to do that, and we still often run into things where it's like, Okay, we need to stop and talk for a minute.
Moxy [00:13:58] But I think streaming has forced us to practice that. Getting really good at that has led us to...
Verve [00:14:04] It's been very good.
Moxy [00:14:05] ...Pretty great sex!
Verve [00:14:06] It's been great.
Aria Vega [00:14:07] And like you said, you've been building over time, this vocabulary and this shorthand to be able to communicate with each other, which is valuable for any two people who have sex regularly, whether or not it's on camera. I wonder, is there... What advice would you give to couples who are trying to build and establish that shorthand and that vocab for helping each other's sexual needs be understood without... Here's what I'm getting at. I feel like online, I see a lot of people complaining about the notion of communicating during sex and complaining about like, "Oh, it takes away the mystery. It takes away the spontaneity" and coming up with reasons why it takes something away, and I feel like what you're describing is how it can add to a sexual encounter.
Moxy [00:14:55] Yeah, I think what you're getting at, and I think something we realized early on, was having conversations beforehand and after[ward], and not necessarily having to have our like sex life and sexual health need to be just about...
Verve [00:15:14] Just when we're having sex.
Moxy [00:15:15] Yeah, just actively having sex. It's conversations that we're having beforehand, or all the time, or afterwards. We often we'll be like, "Hey, was that fun? Was that good?"
Verve [00:15:28] "Oh I saw this earlier" or 'do you think that that's hot?" I think just integrating it and trying to break down some of that internalized shame around sex can really help people communicate better. I know something for me, I get really easily embarrassed, so I think being able to embrace the things that I'm embarrassed about and know that I'm safe is really important. I don't know, I get embarrassed when I queef, but you always giggle and then you like pat me on the head and I'm like, That's nice. So yeah, don't settle for partners who won't giggle and pat you on the head when you queef. Sometimes partners reinforce the things that you feel shame about, and once that happens a couple of times, it can be really difficult to come back to that. And it can be difficult when it builds up and it doesn't get dealt with.I think that happens in long term relationships sometimes, so I think being able to reestablish a playfulness and a new freshness in your relationship can be useful. But it's hard, it's easier said than done. I try not to take myself too seriously, and just this is supposed to be a fun thing. It's only for the people involved. I don't need to bring the whole world into that. I get to have that for me and decide what that is.
Aria Vega [00:16:37] Yeah, and like you said, I think so many of us take sex so seriously and are are afraid to laugh even when we want to. A lot of us care a lot more about the mood, this, you know, proverbial Mood than, you know, what we're actually enjoying.
Verve [00:16:51] Yeah, but I don't know. The mood can be silly. I'm okay with the mood being silly! And then yeah, if the mood is strong, it'll still be strong. So that's what I think.
Moxy [00:17:02] Yeah, as much as I enjoy hot and heavy sex, I also really enjoy silly, ridiculous sex and like, both can be fun.
Verve [00:17:13] Both can exist, if you make room for them.
Moxy [00:17:14] Yeah if you make room for both, then you don't have to feel insecure or ashamed when you aren't necessarily feeling the capital-M Mood.
Verve [00:17:24] Oh, that's such a good point.
Aria Vega [00:17:25] And especially in a long term relationship. If you're together for long enough, there's time for all of the types of sex, you know?
[00:17:37] Moxyand Verve are stereotypical sapphic lovers, in that they moved in together just a few months into dating. In their case, they met immediately before the coronavirus lockdowns shuttered their college campus. So shacking up was actually a pretty practical thing to do. But that didn't make it an easy decision.
Verve [00:17:57] We both had experiences living with other people that have been really stressful. So moving in for us was a big decision, but I think it was the right one, and I would make that decision over and over again.
Moxy [00:18:07] Yeah, I definitely feel like you're helping me get past some of that previous baggage, because I get to...I trust you and you're not fucking me over, so.
Verve [00:18:17] Yes.
Aria Vega [00:18:19] Tell me about the lessons that y'all took away from those other living situations.
Moxy [00:18:23] Definitely vulnerability and openness. I feel like in previous situations I ignored when things were getting bad. I just kind ofhoped that it would get better. I just tried to put my best foot forward, and put bad things behind me and just ignore that it happened, but then inevitably it just built up and built resentment, and then it all came crumbling down. I feel like something we've really actively tried to do since we moved in together was just be like, as soon as things are even a little bit off-kilter, we're making time to figure that out. It might not be that moment that we figure it out, but we will. We're going to set aside time and we're going to figure it out, because like...
Verve [00:19:09] Because we have to, or we will resent each other and that will not be good.
Moxy [00:19:14] I'd hate that.
Verve [00:19:14] And we literally have a cat. We cannot, we can't get a divorce.
Moxy [00:19:19] We can't do that to our son.
Aria Vega [00:19:22] Living together has also helped Verve to navigate a personal journey of their own.
Verve [00:19:27] I had undiagnosed ADHD for a really long time, and while getting a diagnosis doesn't change my life or anything, it has helped me find some more tools to actually live a life that I love, where I'm not feeling either constantly bored, are constantly agitated or a mix of both, which sucks. So it's just been a journey of crawling and stuff like that. I feel like living with you has really helped me establish that my health is a priority, and it's been good. That also plays into the earlier thing we were talking about, about like our living situations. Yeah, my mental health was like... It was really difficult to live with people. So I'm glad that we've been able to make it work, and I've been able to break down some of that hard stuff, and be on medication that works. Actually, I wasn't diagnosed when we first started dating. I was diagnosed a couple of months ago, actually. So this is really new, and I only have recently been on medication, but it's been a really lovely journey, just reestablishing the things that I like, and all of my interests and the things that I know that I love that I haven't been fully able to enjoy. And one of those things being sex. It's made sex different.
Aria Vega [00:20:31] Oh, please say more!
Verve [00:20:33] Well, one thing I'm on as well as being on Vyvanse, prescription Vyvanse. I'm also on an anti-depressant/anti-anxiety, and that it's pretty significantly, it makes it so hard to come. It's so hard to come. But I make it work, coming isn't the end all be all. But sometimes I just get so tired that I just can't. And then I think the Vyvanse has kind of contributed to that. I get so focused, but I also we fuck for way longer because I'm just so focused. I've noticed anyways we've been fucking for like 30, 40 minutes, where before I think it'd be 20 minutes on average. Lately I've noticed because I'm like, "No, this is what we're doing now."
Moxy [00:21:18] You're pretty into that.
Verve [00:21:18] I do! I was into it before I just, I was so distracted constantly.
Moxy [00:21:27] Yeah, you seem more in the moment.
Verve [00:21:28] And that's great! I'm so happy about that, because I want to be fully in that moment. My my brain just said no for a while, I guess it still does. So I take medication and it works.
Aria Vega [00:21:41] Moxy, what has it been like to watch Verve go through this journey, and support them in their growth?
Moxy [00:21:46] It's been really exciting. For the most part, it's been really exciting to see them just kind of take hold of their life, because I hope you don't mind me saying that you were facing some challenges and some obstacles to getting that care, and getting that help that you knew you deserved. And I'm glad that I was there, and I hope I was able to help reinforce to you that you did deserve it,to go there and did it. So I was really proud to see you just take charge of your life, and take charge of your own health, and get the help that you that you know you deserved. And you know, there's obviously good days and bad days, but I've loved you the whole the whole process still do.
Verve [00:22:26] Awwww!
Aria Vega [00:22:32] That's Lustery couple Moxy and Verve. If you're 18 or older, and you love porn that's upbeat, kinky and colorful, don't miss their work on Lustery.com. You can also find them on Twitter @moxynverve. That's Moxy, the letter N, Verve. If you're into the show, please leave us a five-star rating and a review. POV is brought to you by Lustery, and this episode was hosted by me, Aria Vega. It was edited and produced by Kathryn Fischer and Adrienne Teicher, and our showrunner is Paulita Pappel. Lustery is the home of real-life partners filming their sex lives behind closed doors. Again, if you're 18 or older, you can find us at Lustery.com, and we're on Twitter and Instagram @lusterypov. Until next time, lovers!