Brat Bdsm: How to Be a Brat

How We Explore Brat BDSM with Emanuel & Jane 

How do you know if you’re into brat BDSM? Whether you’re new to the world of BDSM or an experienced kinkster trying something new, it’s hard to tell if being a brat is right for you. What does it even mean? How do you start? How do you know if it’s something that works well for you and your partner? All valid questions, and here, you can find some answers. 

Knowledge and communication are key when it comes to anything BDSM. So, before we dive into the specifics of entering brat BDSM, let’s brush up on some general BDSM terms.

An umbrella term to describe sexual acts of bondage, dominance/submission, 

 is a sexual role in a sexual dynamic (often referred to as Daddy, Sir, Mistress, Miss, etc.).

A person whose style of dominance focuses more on pleasure and praise.

A person whose style of dominance focuses more on intense play and punishments.

A submissive partner is a sexual role in a sexual dynamic (often referred to as a sub, submissive, baby girl, kitten, etc.).

A person whose submission style focuses on bratty behaviors (best paired with a rough dom persona).

A person whose style of submission focuses on being of service to their dominant partner, pleasuring them (best paired with a pleasure dom persona).

A sexual experience involving BDSM play is typically referred to as a scene.

An intimate and meaningful connection shared after a BDSM scene that is meant to bring the partners together. This is also a time for the partners to discuss the scene if needed.

If you’re a submissive partner, with this knowledge, you can better assess which kind of submissive you’d like to be. It’s important to remember that your style, likes/dislikes and desires can change over time. You can be a service sub, a bratty sub, or a bit of both. 

If you’ve never tried bratty behavior before, it can be tricky to know if it’s something you will like. So let’s talk about a few instances where your current desires may allude to you being on the bratty side. 

you might be into brat BDSM. Someone who likes the chase, the game, and the prelude to the main event may really enjoy light brat behavior to make the fireworks at the end that much better. 

..you may be into brat BDSM. If it gets you off to be told when (and how) to climax, you might like trying to add some brattiness to your end-game.

If you and your partner tease each other, joke around, or have a lot of witty banter between you

...you may be into brat BDSM. This kind of playfulness is easily translated into devilish bratty behavior in the bedroom. 

 or other forms of impact play are regular repeats in your sex life…you may be into brat BDSM. These kinds of things can easily turn into fun punishments for bratty behavior. 

If you use sex or sexual expression as an outlet to release stress…you may be into brat BDSM. Many people use sex as a coping tool for daily stress, and it can be even more fun if you inject some bratty tendencies into the mix. 

Are you wondering how you can become a bratty sub? Like with many things relating to BDSM, you want to do your research before integrating this into your sex life. 

The first step, as always, is to talk with your partner about it. Explain that you’re interested in trying out some bratty behaviors and ask how they feel about it. Be sure to discuss any potential limitations and have your safe word in place in case one of you has a misstep. 

If you and your partner have an established kink dynamic, you can discuss what rules can be broken and what specific punishments can be for breaking said rules. Negotiation and communication can be a great tool for foreplay and ensure that everyone goes into this with the same expectations. 

How exactly do you behave like a sexual brat? 

If you’re looking for some easy ways to try out being a bratty sub, here are some starter tips for mixing some playful brattiness into your sex life. 

Use the “make me” technique. Any instruction or act that your partner asks you to do, reply with a sassy “make me”. Bonus points if you stick your tongue out at them - this is typical brat behavior and is sure to spice things up. 

Offer some pushback (sometimes literally). If you and your partner like to wrestle or pin each other down, this could be a great time to introduce physical brattiness. Push back against them or fight back a little if they try to pin you to the bed, for example. 

Don’t give in so easily. As a submissive partner, it’s maybe in your nature to give in to what your dominant partner likes. Instead, offer consensual resistance and watch how feral it makes them (and yourself). 

Flip the tables on them. While you may be used to being called a good girl or a good submissive, peak bratty behavior is to jokingly tell them they are being good for you. If they bring you a glass of water, for example - instead of thank you, you can call them a good boy/girl. This is sure to get their attention in exactly the way you’d like. 

Disobey direct orders. Of course, this is within reason - but let’s say they tell you to get on your knees. Don’t do this (and maybe apply the “make me” technique) and see just how far you can push your luck. 

Tease them at inappropriate times. Maybe they are at work and you’re sending them naughty photos… or maybe you’re out to dinner with your family and you’re teasing them a little under the table. These are peak bratty behaviors that will drive them crazy. 

Start the game without them. Let’s say your dominant partner is playing a video game or tidying up after dinner. Go into the bedroom and get the naughty games started by yourself. When they walk in, things will heat up fast because you’ve been a brat who started without them. 

Being a bratty sub means aftercare is a must.

Aftercare is always important, but even more so when you’ve injected some bratty behaviors into the mix. After the fun and games have ended, reconnecting with your dominant partner is essential. Talk about the scene, what happened, what didn’t, and how you both felt about it. Talk about specifics - was anything said that was a little too far, was everything comfortable? 

This is a great time to relax into your obedient submissiveness and share an intimate moment. Maybe your dominant partner can tell you some of the things they enjoyed about your brat BDSM play and give you some fun ideas for the next time around.  

Emanuel & Jane

Emanuel & Jane met at a coffee shop… almost daily for two years when Jane would come in, order a decaf coffee and head barista Emanuel would quietly judge her for it. It took him faking an interest in Taylor Swift for them to get talking but it was a very real shared interests in all things kinky that kicked off a strong D/s dynamic. From shibari and anal play to ownership and a D/s contract, the polyamorous pair say their sex is all about consent, trust and communication. “We fuck almost every day. Yes, we’re exhausted. And yes, we love it!”

Jane

Emanuel

Lustery couple Emanuel & Jane: from bondage and anal play to domination, submission and their consensual D/s contract. Watch their kinky videos now!

Age	28 & 27
Type	open-relationship
Location	Ghent, Belgium
Sex life	Kinky

How We Explore Brat BDSM with Emanuel & Jane

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Emanuel & Jane