A Lesson From An Expert

Category: Erotica

Author: Suzannah Weiss

Oh, the messages you get on dating apps when your profile says you’re a sex coach. Of course, there are the people who take that as license to send you whatever sexual messages they please. Then, there are those who are curious about what your work entails.

And… occasionally… you get people requesting your help.

It was on a sunny June afternoon that I found myself receiving my first request of this sort. The message was from Evan, a soccer coach living in my area. After seeing his ‘like’ on Hinge, I commented that I, like him, had two cats.

“Three, technically,” he replied. “For real. Can you teach me how to eat 🐱? I’d pay, of course.”

I was taken aback by the offer — in a good way. I love teaching men how to please women, and I love being pleased, so having both at once — plus money — was pretty much my ideal scenario. “Lol, are you serious?” I wrote back. “That’s a dream.”

I gave him my number, and soon, I received a text reading “Hey, it’s Evan 🐱”.

“Hi,” I replied. “So, did you want to practice on me, or did you just want me to verbally teach you?”

“Practice, duh. Practice makes perfect.”

“My usual coaching fee is $200/hour. Does that work for you?”

“Let me think about it. Can we fuck after?”

“Haha, I’m gonna say no.”

“What if I do really well?”

“Only if I genuinely want to.”

“OK.”

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I thought about it and realized I should have some kind of safety precaution in place. “I’d like to take a walk first to get to know you and make sure I feel safe with you. Then, if all is good, we can come up to my place and I’ll give you pussy eating lessons. How does that sound?”

“Perfect.”

“Are you available tomorrow?”

“I’m free after 3.”

“Let’s meet at 3:30.” I gave him a street intersection near my apartment building to meet at, then asked, “What feels fair to you re: payment? How about if I collect $200 upfront, and if it goes over an hour, you pay the rest?”

“How about half now, half later? And nudes with the deposit? Or just 🐱 pics.”

“Send me $100 and I’ll send you a 🐱 pic.”

I half expected him to back out at that point but a few minutes later, he’d venmoed me $100 — of course, with a cat face in the description. So, as promised, I hiked up my skirt, slid my underwear to the side, and snapped a photo of my pussy, which happened to be freshly shaven, then texted him the image, which he quickly marked with a heart.

“As promised, I hiked up my skirt, slid my underwear to the side, and snapped a photo of my pussy, which happened to be freshly shaven…”

The following afternoon, I walked out to the corner to greet him. In shorts and sunglasses, he was not so attractive that I’d have hooked up with him for free, but decent-looking enough to make this work.

“Shall we take a walk?” I proposed.

“Let’s go.”

As we began to stroll down to the beach, I suddenly wondered what was customary to talk about in such a situation. We started off with a brief discussion of our upbringings and work, then I turned to the obvious.

“So, what exactly inspired you to get in touch with me?”

“Well,” he pondered, “when I’ve eaten pussy, women haven’t given me much feedback, so I’m not sure if I’m doing it right.”

“You’ve come to the right place. I’m not at all shy about giving feedback,” I reassured him. “But how exactly are you envisioning this? Would you like me to explain the basics of female anatomy to you first, or do you think you’ve got that down?”

“I’ll defer to you. You’re the teacher.”

“All right, well, I was thinking I could show you where everything is, then give you some basic technique pointers… and then we can practice?”

“I’m down for that.”

“Should we head back?”

Up in my bedroom, he venmoed me the remaining $100, then asked, “What if I give you a little extra — then can we fuck?”

I’d already decided I wasn’t going to fuck him but it occurred to me that this might be an opportunity to fulfill a fantasy of mine. For the past year or so, I’d been touching myself to the thought of sucking cock for money. Something about the sense of providing a service to someone else like that got me going. Plus, he’d revealed to me that it was his birthday the previous week, so I thought I’d offer him a nice little birthday present.

“I’m not gonna fuck you,” I told him, “but for an extra $100, I’d suck your cock.”

“Sounds fair.” He venmoed me another $100, and electricity shot through my body. I was actually doing this.

I looked at the clock. It was around 3:45. “We’re on the clock now,” I announced, “so anything after 4:45 costs extra. Now, let me get something.”

Trying to maintain as professional an air as I could in this situation, I opened up my sex drawer — full of sex toys, lube, and other X-rated goodies — and got out a small hand mirror. Then, I took off my dress (I wasn’t wearing panties since I knew they’d be off soon enough), spread my legs, and beckoned him over so he could see exactly what I was looking at.

“I took off my dress (I wasn’t wearing panties since I knew they’d be off soon enough), spread my legs, and beckoned him over so he could see exactly what I was looking at.”

“These are the outer labia.” I ran my hands up and down the silky-smooth skin of my pinkish outer lips, both of us gazing into the mirror between my legs. “These are the inner labia.” I softly caressed the smaller lips inside. “This is the clitoris.” I gave my clit a gentle rub, then spread my pussy wide for him. “Down here is the vaginal opening. Do you have any questions so far?”

“Wait, so the clit is up there? I thought it was sort of underneath that.”

“Well, technically, you’re right. What you’re seeing is the clitoral hood.” I lifted up the hood so he could see the little pink pearl underneath. “That’s the clit. But mostly, if you’re fingering someone or going down on them, you’ll be making contact with the hood. The clit itself is often too sensitive and too hidden.”

“So, when I’m fingering someone, I should be touching there? Not just putting my fingers inside?”

“You can put your fingers inside, but clitoral stimulation is more likely to lead to an orgasm.”

“Good to know.”

“Want me to go over technique now?”

“Yes, please.”

“So, there are a few different ways to touch the clitoris,” I explained, drawing on scripts from workshops I’d taught (and never expected to be reciting in this manner). “You can move your fingers or tongue up and down, from left to right, or in circles.” I demonstrated on my own clit. “If you put a finger in, it’s best to use a come-hither motion.” I held my hand up and demonstrated that for him as well.

“Sounds like fun. Can we get started?”

“Yes.”

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I put my mirror away, lay all the way down on the bed, and invited him to begin pleasuring me. “It’s best if you start by running your hands up and down my body, especially my breasts. The longer the buildup, the more intense the pleasure.”

He did as I told him, then positioned himself in between my legs after a while, and I felt his tongue moving up and down then back and forth, as I’d instructed him.

“I’m going to tell you what works best, then once you’ve found something good, stick with it, okay?”

“Mmm.”

Soon, he got a nice circular motion going. “Mmm, that feels good, keep doing that.”

His technique wasn’t bad, though I could see why he needed some help. His motions were a little imprecise. I enjoyed it, but it wasn’t quite getting me off, and after a few minutes, he asked if he could take a break.

“A cock-sucking break?” I suggested, a devilish smirk appearing on my face.

“Yes, please.”

I had him take his clothes off and switch places with me, not letting on how supremely aroused I was by the thought that a blowjob from me was such an amazing gift to him, he’d offered up $100 of his hard-earned money for it.

I grabbed his cock, which was about average size and fully shaven, and looked into his eyes as I started jerking it up and down. He closed his eyes and tilted his head back in satisfaction, and I began to move downward, teasing him with little licks around the head until I took it into my mouth.

“Oh god, that feels good,” he moaned as I bobbed up and down as deep as I could, determined to give a true $100 blowjob. I judged by his continued utterance of “fuck” and “oh god” that I was doing all right — but just to make it extra special, I offered with a smile, “Would you like to cum in my mouth?”

“Oh, yeah, I would.”

I instantly got wet as I thought of how pleasant a surprise this must be for him. Fueled by that excitement, I bobbed my head faster until he started moaning louder and exploded into my mouth. I swallowed it all, just as I’d promised, and went the extra mile by licking off a few drops that had landed on his stomach.

“Fueled by that excitement, I bobbed my head faster until he started moaning louder and exploded into my mouth.”

“Now, back to me,” I giggled, leaning back and opening my legs for him.

“Whoa, you’re wet. Is that normal?” he asked.

“Let me see.” I got my mirror and looked at myself. I could indeed see my juices leaking out, so much so that a string of fluid had spread onto my left outer lip. “Yes, that’s normal,” I told him. “It means my pussy is happy… Want to make it happier?”

“Let me try fingering you this time.”

“I’ll show you how I do it.” I reached down and rubbed my clit from side to side, as I’d been doing by myself for many years.

“Interesting,” he said. “So you’re actually touching above your clit.”

“Yeah, on my clitoral hood. Now you try.”

He reached in between my legs, and I let out a sigh as he softly rubbed my clit. Like his pussy eating, his fingering was a bit lacking in precision, but with some more instruction — “further down”, “faster”, “wider circles” — I finally started approaching orgasm.

“Keep doing that,” I told him. Of course, that made him switch it up and go faster. “No, exactly that. Slower.” It took some more maneuvering, but soon enough, I let out a moan and my body started shaking, then I collapsed on the bed.

“Good job!” I told him, giving him a high five once I’d recovered.

“Now, can we fuck?” he asked.

I laughed. “I’m not going to fuck you. But, if you want, I’ll suck your cock again for an extra $50.”

“Nah.”

“All right, $25. Just as a belated birthday gift.”

“Deal.” I didn’t let on how much I enjoyed that part too.

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He lay back down, and I kneeled between his legs, taking his cock into my mouth once again, flicking my tongue on the underside of the head, then wrapping my lips around it and sucking, eliciting more moans and groans. It wasn’t long before I felt it pulsate in my mouth again, and I swallowed my second load of the day.

I sat back up, wiped my mouth off with a smile, and looked at the clock. “It’s 4:40. We did it.”

“Okay, I just need a minute to cool off.”

“You have five.”

I got up and got dressed, then he shortly followed, venmoing me an extra $25 with — surprise — another cat face.

“I think what I’ve learned most is how important it is to communicate,” he reflected out loud back in my living room, as he put his shoes on.

“I think what I’ve learned most is how important it is to communicate,” he reflected out loud back in my living room, as he put his shoes on.

“If that’s what you got out of this, I’d consider it a success,” I told him. “Now, go out into the world, and use what you’ve learned to make other women happy.”

“Oh, I will.”

He walked out my door and down the stairs back to his car, and I sighed with the satisfaction of knowing I’d just done something good for women everywhere… and gotten off in the process.

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